When Things Go Left With A Wedding Vendor

Y’all I did not have the best elopement planning experience. There were some bright spots like finding the perfect dress, having an awesome officiant and getting nice pictures from my elopement day. But the rest of that experience was for the birds. So I felt like we should talk about it because I know I wasn’t/will not be the only bride to have negative incidents occur.

Planning a wedding or elopement is full of soooo many emotions. You want a nice day that’s as close to perfect as possible. You’ve done everything you can to ensure your day goes as planned. In the world of weddings and elopements, something is bound to go wrong. That can be heartbreaking, especially if you have your heart set on something specific. There are so many moving pieces, plus you have to trust complete strangers to come through for you. That in and of itself can be nerve wracking. You’re basically going off of referrals or past reviews from other strangers to create your special day. There are wedding vendors out here who are great, organized and super helpful while others can be unorganized, uncommunicative, or unprofessional. So what can you do when the elopement vendor you contact/booked lets you down?

Breathe

Literally take a moment to take a deep breath and exhale. After you get your breathing on point, assess what is happening, then ask yourself if this is something the vendor made a simple mistake and can easily fix or is everything shot to s**t? How important is this vendor or service in the overall scheme of your wedding day or elopement? I remember reaching out to a florist for a custom bouquet and boutonniere for my elopement. I researched quite a few florists in the area I was getting married in. The only one I reached out to responded, sent me a quote and said they would send me an invoice and contract. Great! After a whole month went by without hearing anything from them, I finally received an email saying they forgot to send the invoice and contract and asked me was I still interested. Side eye…now I could have just went with it and still booked them but I took a step back, took a deep breath and thought to myself, if they forgot to do this important task, how would they show up on my elopement day? I know nobody is perfect. I think they may have just been too busy and it was no longer a good fit for me so I declined and moved on. If it’s early in the initial stages of your contact with this vendor, pay attention to their response times, communication and if they do what they say they will do when they say they will do it. If they’re slipping and it’s something simple then it can possibly still work out, but if it’s something that rubs you the wrong way then you need to listen to your gut.

Communicate

In the case that you notice red flags early on before committing to a vendor, please do future you a favor and move on to someone else. But Dareece, what if I’ve already put down money and secured them? So glad you asked! In this case, you have to speak up about what is going on. I know that is so hard to do and easier said than done. Especially because you don’t truly know this person and you want things to work out. You obviously like their work and want them to be a part of your vendor team but something is lacking with them. My husband and I hired an awesome photographer that has an excellent portfolio. I love everything about their work. We booked an engagement session in their location and booked them for our elopement day. As the engagement session date got closer, we realized we hadn’t heard anything from them in regards to preparation, selecting locations in their city to shoot the session, what to wear if that’s encouraged, or just generally what to expect period. We didn’t think they were going to show up. The morning of the day before our engagement photo session, we receive an email from them. On one hand I was glad to hear from them and on the other hand I was highly upset that we were not contacted before that time. So I said something…I was honest about how their lack of communication led us to believe that they weren’t going to show up, left us with no time to research locations and had no clue what to wear. We had nothing. I would love to say the photographer apologized and we worked it out and rode off into the sunset. But that was not the case. In the end, we ended up parting ways altogether. It was so sad and I still feel some kind of way about it. But do not hold your tongue when something a vendor does makes you feel slighted, upset, or anything that’s not positive. You have to get it out and if it goes left field, then let it. You are better than someone treating you as a last thought or not taking your day/time as serious as you are taking it. There are other vendors out there that are a better fit for you.

Pivot

So suppose you’ve made it to your elopement or wedding day. Yay!! The end is almost near!! Everything is going great until you realize a vendor didn’t show up. Wait. What?! Yes, that is a thing guys. I wish it wasn’t so but it is. What do you do? If you’re working with a wedding planner, they normally do damage control for you so you don’t notice. But if it’s a small elopement or an intimate wedding you put together yourself, you’re going to need a back up plan. How can you offset this vendor not showing? If it’s something major like an officiant or witness not showing up, you may be able to find someone else but the ceremony might be delayed by a few hours or a day or two. If it’s a makeup artist or florist, you can dash to Sephora for some makeup or go to Whole Foods for a ready made bouquet. My makeup artist didn’t show up on my elopement day. Wth…when I got in touch with them, they said they had my date down for a different day…smh. I did what I needed to do and made a quick trip to Sephora and did my own makeup. It wasn’t the ideal experience I wanted for myself but it will suffice. Allow yourself extra time to get ready on your elopement or wedding day. This will give you a cushion, just in case something is off schedule, to pivot and regroup.

Remember

Nobody wants anything to go left field on their special day. I don’t care if you are the most chill person in the world. You do not want that stress of trying to figure out an alternative on the day of. But sometimes s**t happens and we have to adjust. Just know that no matter what, as long as your officant, your partner, and your witnesses are present, then you have everything you need. With all the madness of wedding planning, our perspective is the most important and only thing we can control. Try to look at this experience as positive as you can because the stars aligned and you were blessed to find your forever person in this world. It will all work out in the end. : )

Until next time, be safe out there and let me know if any of this resonates with you. If you are getting married in or near Durham, NC and need a bridal hairstylist to create a custom romantic bridal hairstyle for you, let’s work together!

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